Friday, May 4, 2012

Friday Funnies: Marriage

I mentioned earlier this week that Tuesday marked the second anniversary for me and Steve. Thought I'd share a few jokes about marriage:

Marriage Fairy

A couple had been married for 25 years and were also celebrating the husband's 60th birthday. During the party, a fairy appeared and said that because they had been such a loving couple all those years, she would grant them each one wish.

The wife wanted to travel around the world. The fairy waved her wand and boom! She had the tickets in her hand.

Next, it was the husband's turn. He paused for a moment and then said shyly, "Well, I'd like to have a woman who is 30 years younger than me." The fairy picked up her wand and boom! He was 90.

* * *

The Secret of a Happy Marriage

A man and woman had been married for sixty years. They kept no secrets from each other except a shoebox the woman had in the top of her closet that she had cautioned her husband never to open or ask about.

However, one day the woman got sick and the doctor said she would not recover. The man got the shoebox and took it to his wife's bedside. She agreed it was time he should know what was in the box.

When he opened it, he found two crocheted doilies and a stack of money totaling $25,000.

She said, "When we were to be married, my grandmother told me the secret of a happy marriage was to never argue. She told me that if I ever got angry with you, I should just keep quiet and crochet a doily."

The old man was so moved he had to fight back tears. Only two doilies in the box. She had only been angry with him two times in sixty years. He almost burst with happiness.

"Honey," he said, "that explains the doilies, but what about all of this money? Where did it come from?"

"Oh," she said, "that's the money I made from selling doilies."

* * *

Bottle of Wine

Sally was driving home from one of her business trips in Northern Arizona when she saw an elderly Navajo woman walking on the side of the road. As the trip was a long and quiet one, she stopped the car and asked the Navajo woman if she would like a ride. With a silent nod of thanks, the woman got into the car.

Resuming the journey, Sally tried in vain to make a bit of small talk with the Navajo woman. The old woman just sat silently, looking intently at everything she saw, studying every little detail, until she noticed a brown bag on the seat next to Sally.

"What's in the bag?" asked the old woman.

Sally looked down at the brown bag and said, "It's a bottle of wine I got it for my husband."

The Navajo woman was silent for another moment or two. Then, speaking with the quiet wisdom of an elder, she said, "Good trade."

* * *

Things You Don't Say to Your Wife


Debbie H said...

I am laughing out loud! LOL! ;) Thanks for the funnies this Friday, and Happy Anniversary! Think I need to share these with the hubs!

Linda R. said...

Thank you and congratulation on your anniversary!

Chelsea said...

Very funny Happy anniversary!

Sue D said...

Funny! I have seen the video before and it is still hilarious.

Eve said...

lol! I'm always looking for your Friday Funny! :-) have a great weekend! Happy Cinco de Mayo~~ ;-)

Jackie Wamhoff said...

Thanks very much for your sweet comments, ladies. It makes ME smile knowing that I've helped make YOU smile! :-D

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