In honor of his presence, I'm posting a few Italian-themed jokes...probably not a very politically correct thing to do, but I hope you'll enjoy them as much as I do!
Q: Did you hear about the Italian chef that died?
A: He pasta way.
Q: How do you make holy water?
A: Boil the hell out of it!
Q: How to you silence an Italian?
A: You tie their hands behind their back.
An Italian man immigrates to the United States and moves in with some distant relatives in New Jersey. They tell him he should apply for citizenship and they will help him study for the test. They go over all the U.S. history from the Revolutionary War to present day. Finally, he feels he has enough knowledge to pass the test, so he sets an appointment.
The big day arrives, and he walks into the testing room. The agent giving the test thinks he will have a bit of fun, so he says to the man, "We have a very simple test for you today. If you can use three English words in one sentence, you will be granted citizenship! The words are green, pink, and yellow."
The Italian man ponders over this for several minutes and finally says, "Okay, I think I can do that." He continues, "I hearda the telephone go green, green, green, so I pink it uppa and I say, 'Yellow, who is this?'"